Dear ,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike you. I think I realized it when I saw the shrunken head at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that I get turned on by garbage men. I'm returning your Darth Vader poster to you, but I'll keep your suicide note as a memory. You should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the apartment building.

Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,





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